Video Game Expo PICS!!

Alex is terrified.


Dave seems to be at a loss.


31 Losers...erm...People play DDR


Couldn't figure out who this was supposed to be at first...then just stopped caring.


2nd, 3rd, and 4th rows may fall apart if played with.


Tortured Artists and their drawings of homoerotic fan fiction scenes.


Either these people just got off of a very short bus, or Guitar Hero World Tour is the most fascinating fucking thing on the planet. Your call.


Unfortunately, these stationery video game racers couldn't help the riders speed to the Exits.


Robogyno-The Robotic Gynecologist. Free Tests!


Before the crowds arrive, Dig Philly attempts to figure out the Internets.


NBC10's Tim Furlong seems tragically lost.


Okay...This fucking kid wailed on Guitar Hero for no less than an hour. We watched as everyone switched positions with someone else in line...and everyone was too scared to ask this little shit for the microphone. Incidentally, that's probably his dad behind him, thinking: "fuck my life."


This woman was just asked if her company would be interested in a game that realistically depicted that guy's day-to-day life--sitting in his grandmother's car outside of the girls' highschool.


This company was very interesting; and their spokesperson didn't seem entirely like an elitist bitch. I had a lapse and needed to be reminded where I was.


I don't own an Xbox360...so it's always nice to be reminded why I hate the controllers.


Two Dig Philly employees stare blankly off into the distance while two Hefty Bags with eyes play XBOX.


This Game Stop guy just wanted to go home...and this fucking kid wasn't helping matters.


I had to walk away from this kid quietly, so he would stop asking me retarded questions about a game I only played for 3 minutes.


The Truck of Disappointment.


Jedi Knights? Ninjas? Ninja Jedi? Can't begin to describe their stage show.


Tim Furlong desperately seeks a way out.


Husky Jedi Knight takes his glasses off to play TRON. 'Nuff Said.


The computers asked a bunch of information before playing. At the bottom it said "Information will only be used for Recruiting Purposes." We said "fuck that" and went away.


Right beside the Army Game tent, there was this maniac selling swords, knives, and blades. There was also a Mace with 12-sided dice; so in this case, "Maniac" isn't libelous.


Pwned.com


Suicide Girls essentially scraped the bottom of the barrel with these girls. That being said...they still stood out amongst the typical "gamer girl" crowd.


You have to respect a Guild...unless it has to do with CCGs or LARPers. But once you've gained so much weight that you need an electric cart to get around, it may be time to join the Salad-Eating Guild.


I saw robots and I got really excited! Then I realized that these giant complex machines had only two functions: to catch and throw a big ball.


I'm not sure who is a bigger loser, so you decide. The guy who MADE the authentic-looking Storm Trooper uniforms, or the douche who is making sure the gun is authentic enough.


You know, some weird girls can be very attractive...in a quirky sort of way...but one can easily cross over into the type of creepy that starts to become a turn off. Oh well...at least she stopped playing her fucking flute to smile for an impromptu picture.


She looked at me as if to say "He's right behind me, isn't he...?"


At the Renaissance fair's Joust you have to take the side of whatever Knight they tell you to. In a Star Wars Jedi Duel, you almost HAVE to go for the one who isn't fucking wearing glasses.


Some child at the Expo were very excited to see this. Little did he know that he shares a common bond with the Dark Lord...they both live with their parents.


This Gamer's Chair comes complete with three screens, multiple moveable surfaces, stirrup-like devices to put your feet on, and a chair that allows you to lean back with the screens hovering above. It has two uses: Masturbation, and making this kid fatter and lazier.


This sluggish Jedi exhibits the amazing grip he has on his homemade lightsaber, while tragically ignoring the lackluster grip he has on reality.


Dave is having a hard time with the practically impossible arcade games of yester-year.


This hardcore little kid displays how playing a video game where you attack the Death Star is fucking cool no matter what.


Before you ask...No. There was no Mario. If you lack the self-esteem to dress up like the most iconic character in video game history and decide to go for his slightly retarded brother instead, you're probably attending the Video Game Expo.


First I saw this half-decent Blade costume...


...and then I saw the guy he was with...and I said "What the fuck?"


I have to admit, it's a pretty cool costume. But I can't help but ask "why?" But what the hell? At least he's warm.


This fourth-rate version of The Rock walked around all day handing out autographed pictures of himself...and before one could as "Who the fuck are you?"...he was gone!


The Prince stands proud, but obviously nervous...next to a female.


Little do people know, but Anime Nerds can move at fantastic speeds.


The children in the front row look on, horrified, by the howling and flailing grown ups who set out to destroy them.





And that's it, everyone!! I hope you enjoyed this little experiment! Maybe next time...or sometime in the near future, we'll have our own table at this thing...and then we'll have some real fun.